06/17/2026
One of the harder estate planning conversations is this one:
"Who do I trust to step in if I couldn't handle things myself?"
Or even harder:
"Who would I ask to carry things forward after I'm gone?"
Many families avoid asking because they don't want to burden someone they love. They worry the person will feel overwhelmed. They worry the conversation will feel too heavy, too serious, too soon.
I understand that.
Years ago, my parents came to me about serving in an important role for them. They were hesitant. They thought I might feel burdened by the responsibility.
I didn't feel burdened.
I felt honored.
That conversation stayed with me. And I see it reflected back in my work all the time.
The people we love are often more willing than we expect. They may feel grateful to be trusted. They may feel relieved that someone had the courage to bring it up.
And they don't have to figure it out alone. When someone is named as an executor, trustee, agent under power of attorney, or another fiduciary, part of my role is to guide that person when the time comes. They don't need to know every legal step in advance. They need to be trustworthy, willing to ask questions, and open to guidance.
A few things that can make the conversation easier:
Start with what's true. "I trust your judgment. That's why I wanted to talk with you."
Be honest about what's involved. "There may be decisions, paperwork, and coordination with professionals."
Let them know they won't be alone. "My attorney can guide you through it."
Give them room to respond. "I want you to understand what I'm asking. Take the time you need."
Estate planning isn't only about documents. It's about choosing the right people. And sometimes, the conversation you've been putting off becomes one of the most meaningful ones your family ever has.
If you're ready to have that conversation and want support getting there, I'd be glad to help.
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