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05/29/2026

Did you know? Many major banks have their own internal POA forms. A valid, attorney-drafted document can be rejected simply because it is not THEIR paperwork.

Knowing that ahead of time is the difference between a plan that exists and a plan that works.

05/28/2026

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐅𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐬 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐍𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐈𝐭 𝐌𝐨𝐬𝐭

This happens far more than it should.

You signed a Power of Attorney (POA), named someone you trust, and filed it away with your important documents. You felt the quiet relief of having that handled. But here's what most families don't discover until they're already in a crisis: a perfectly valid POA can be rejected by your bank, and there may be very little your family can do about it in the moment. What that means is that they would have to go to court to get access to your financial accounts, be able to pay your bills, and make financial decisions when you can’t.

I've seen this happen far too often. I've gotten calls from clients' adult children who are standing at a bank counter, valid POA in hand, being told the document is "too old" or that the bank has its own form. By the time anyone calls me, they're in crisis mode, and the options are much more limited than they would have been six months earlier.

𝐌𝐲 𝐣𝐨𝐛 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐒𝐞𝐞 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐈𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐞

Here's the scenario I hear most often. A parent has a stroke. The adult child, named as an agent on a durable POA for years, goes to the bank to pay bills, cover care expenses, and keep the household running.

The bank says no.

Or: they need to send it to their legal department. Or: the document is too old. Or: they have their own form, and this one isn't it.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐝 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐰. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐜𝐤, 𝐝𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬.

This is not rare. I hear versions of this story far too often. Getting the bank's legal department to accept the document can take two to four weeks, assuming it clears at all. The utility bills do not wait. The mortgage does not pause.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: When I work with a family, I close this gap before a crisis arrives, not while one is happening.

𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐁𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐏𝐮𝐬𝐡 𝐁𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐃𝐨 𝐀𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐈𝐭

Banks aren't acting in bad faith when they reject a valid POA. They have one concern: protecting themselves from liability. If they let the wrong person access an account based on a forged or revoked document, they can be sued. And once the account holder has lost capacity, there is no one left for the bank to call to confirm the agent is who they say they are. So they err on the side of caution. Sometimes extreme caution.

Here's what I do with every client to reduce or eliminate this risk:

𝟏. 𝐑𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐎𝐀 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐦 𝐢𝐭. I go with clients, or walk them through the process of bringing the POA to every bank while the account holder is alive and capable. The bank reviews it, places it on file, and there's a record. When a crisis happens later, the document is already known. This one step eliminates the most common friction. If a compliance officer raises a question, you are there to answer it rather than your adult child during a crisis.

𝟐. 𝐔𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤'𝐬 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐬. Many large institutions, including Chase, Fidelity, Vanguard, and Schwab, have their own internal POA forms they prefer or require. I find out which institutions use proprietary forms and make sure we complete those alongside the attorney-drafted document. That gives your family two clean paths instead of one point of failure. It is one of the most practical protections I build into a plan.

𝟑. 𝐔𝐩𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐞. Banks are more comfortable with recently executed documents. I build a review schedule into every plan so your POA doesn't age into a liability. Every three to five years is a reasonable cadence. An aging document is not just a compliance risk: it is an invitation for a bank to say no at the worst possible time.

𝟒. 𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭. A standard POA terminates the moment someone becomes incapacitated. That's the opposite of what you need. I make sure every POA I draft or review includes clear durable language. If you have a document and you are not certain whether it is durable, that is worth a conversation before you need to find out.

𝟓. 𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜 𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲. I name the types of acts your agent is authorized to perform: wire transfers, account closures, investment decisions. The more specific the authorization, the harder it is for a compliance officer to say no. Specificity is not about distrust. It is about giving every institution a clear reason to cooperate.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: I don't just draft the document. I make sure it works at every institution that holds your money.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐇𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐈𝐬 𝐀𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞

Here is what the first 24 hours look like for a family that has done this work.

The call comes. A parent has been hospitalized. The adult child named as agent does not go to the bank with a stack of documents and a knot in their stomach. They call me.

I already know the family. I know which institutions hold the accounts. I know whether the trust is funded and who the successor trustee is. The bank already has the POA on file: we registered it together when we last updated the plan. The investment accounts are held in the trust, so there is no POA question at all. The successor trustee has a clearer path to step in, and the bank has a familiar process to follow.

What can take two to four weeks of waiting, rejection, and escalation takes an afternoon.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: That is the difference between a plan that exists and a plan that works.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐈 𝐑𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐅𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲

All of the above helps. But there's an approach that sidesteps the problem entirely, and it's the reason 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐈 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐝, 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐚 𝐏𝐎𝐀.

When your assets are held in a trust, the trust owns those accounts, not you as an individual. The bank's relationship is with the trust, not with any particular person. When the original trustee becomes incapacitated, the successor trustee steps in. There is usually far less friction with the bank. No waiting period. No question about whether the document is "too old."

Banks understand trusts. They have clear, well-established procedures for working with trustees. The framework is familiar and legally unambiguous in a way that a POA during incapacity simply is not.

I still include a POA in every plan. It covers assets outside the trust, interactions with government agencies, and situations a trustee cannot handle. A separate healthcare directive covers medical decisions. But for the core problem, the one that leaves families stranded at a bank counter on a Tuesday afternoon, a funded revocable trust is the most reliable tool in the plan.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: A POA is a necessary document. It is not, by itself, a complete plan. And the difference between those two things is exactly what I'm here to help you see. That is what a Life & Legacy Plan® is designed to make sure of: not just that the documents exist, but that everything is in place and will actually work when your family needs it.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐃𝐨 𝐁𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐍𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐤

The work I do with clients on this is not just about drafting documents. It's about testing the plan before it's needed.

I check whether the POA has been registered at each institution, confirm that trust assets are actually titled in the trust name, and schedule a review before the documents age into a problem. A trust that hasn't been funded isn't protecting anything.

The families whose plans held up called before the crisis. The ones who call after are the ones I wish I had reached sooner.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: My job is to make sure you're in the second group, not the first.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐂𝐚𝐧 𝐃𝐨 𝐑𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐍𝐨𝐰

If you already have a POA, here are three things worth doing this week:

• 𝐂𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤. Ask whether they have a preferred POA form. If they do, let's get it completed.

• 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞. If your document is more than five years old, let's talk about updating it, even if it's technically still valid.

• 𝐀𝐬𝐤 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐤𝐞𝐲 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭. If they are not, that's the most important conversation we can have.

If you're not sure whether what you have will actually function when your family needs it, let's find out together.

As your Personal Family Lawyer®, I don't just create documents. I don’t create one-size-fits-all plans. I make sure the plan I build with you will actually work when the people you love need it to. That means testing it against the real institutions holding your money and making sure every gap is closed. That's what a Life & Legacy Plan is designed to do.

Schedule a complimentary 15-minute discovery call and let's find out where your plan stands.

Warmly,

Matt Wasinger, Attorney and Counselor at Law

This article is a service of Matt Wasinger, Personal Family Lawyer®. We don’t just draft documents; we ensure you make informed and empowered decisions about life and death, for yourself and the people you love. That's why we offer a Family Wealth Planning Session, ™ during which you will get more financially organized than you’ve ever been before, and make all the best choices for the people you love. You can begin by calling our office today to schedule a Family Wealth Planning Session and mention this article to find out how to get this $750 session at no charge.

05/25/2026

You signed the Power of Attorney. You named someone you trust. You filed it away and felt the quiet relief of having that handled.

Here's what most families don't discover until they're already in a crisis: a perfectly valid Power of Attorney is often rejected at your bank right when your family needs it, and there may be very little they can do about it in the moment.

Book a calll with our office today and have it done right.

05/22/2026

What does the state actually do with your estate if you don't leave a will?
It applies a formula. Every state has a default set of rules, called intestate succession laws, that determine who inherits, in what order, and in what proportion. Those rules don't know who you trusted, who you wanted to provide for, or what you would have wanted for the people you loved.

For most families, that formula feels inadequate. For Tony Hsieh's family, it became a years-long crisis. Tony founded Zappos, sold it to Amazon for $1.2 billion, and wrote a bestselling book called Delivering Happiness.

He died at 46 with hundreds of millions of dollars, no will, and no trust. His estate went through public probate: every creditor, every contested claim, and every disputed asset on the court record for anyone to find.

A Personal Family Lawyer® attorney starts the planning conversation long before that moment. Not just drafting documents, but making sure the plan is funded, current, and backed by someone your family can actually call when something happens.

Contact us today.

05/21/2026

𝐇𝐞 𝐒𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 $𝟏.𝟐 𝐁𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐨𝐧. 𝐇𝐞 𝐃𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐧 𝐄𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐧.

If something happened to you tomorrow, would the people you love know what to do? Would they have the legal authority to do it?

Most people think they have a plan, or at least that they will. What they rarely picture is what happens in the days and weeks before anyone can act: while the courts sort it out, while the family waits, while everything that was carefully built sits in limbo.

Tony Hsieh spent his career building things that worked. He turned a struggling online shoe company into a billion-dollar brand and wrote a bestselling book about it: 𝘋𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘏𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴. He spent his career publicly, vocally devoted to the idea that joy was something you could design, build, and give to people. And then he left the people he loved with one of the most painful, chaotic estate situations in recent memory.

𝐇𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐭 𝐚 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐞.

When Tony died on November 27, 2020, at 46, in a house fire in New London, Connecticut, he left behind an estate estimated in the hundreds of millions. He also left behind no will, no trust, and no instructions for the people who loved him.

What his family inherited instead was a legal crisis that would play out in courtrooms and headlines for years. And the hardest part? None of it had to happen. Not a single day of it.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 "𝐍𝐨 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐧" 𝐀𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐭

When someone dies without a will, the law decides what happens next. Every state has a default set of rules, called intestate succession laws, that dictate who inherits, in what order, and in what proportion. Those rules don't know who you trusted, who you wanted to provide for, or what you would have wanted for the people you loved. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐲 𝐚 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐚.

For most families, that formula may produce the outcome you want in terms of who gets what, but it only happens after the equivalent of a lawsuit filed by your family against your estate for the benefit of your creditors. It could take months or years, but in all events, it’s a time and money expense that can be avoided with planning.

Tony's family, his father Richard and brother Andrew, stepped in to administer his estate. And "administer" means going through probate court. Probate is a public process. Every creditor, every claimant, every person who believed Tony had promised them something became part of the court record.

The proceedings became a window into the chaos of his final months. 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐨𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥-𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧, 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐫, 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐤𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐞.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: Without an estate plan, the state writes the plan for you. The result is public, slow, and shaped by rules that may have nothing to do with your actual wishes.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐬 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐁𝐞 𝐕𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐝

In the months before his death, claims emerged that Tony had made significant promises to people in his life: cash, property, and financial commitments. Some were tied to written notes. Many were based on alleged verbal agreements. Almost none had the kind of legal documentation that makes a transfer unambiguous.

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐠𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧'𝐭 𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝, 𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐝, 𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐮𝐧𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝, 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝. And when the estate is worth hundreds of millions of dollars, the incentive to challenge them is enormous.

His estate administrators had to spend years sorting through which claims were legitimate and which could be disputed. People who believed Tony had promised them something found themselves in legal uncertainty. What may have been genuine generosity became a source of conflict instead.

A Life & Legacy Plan doesn't just protect what happens after you die. It creates a clear, documented structure for everything you own while you're alive, so that every decision you make about your assets is intentional, recorded, and legally clean. It removes the ambiguity that turns generosity into a lawsuit.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: When claimed gifts lack legal documentation, they become contested. A Life & Legacy Plan doesn't just protect what happens after you die. It creates clarity while you're alive.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 & 𝐋𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐜𝐲 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝

Here is what a Life & Legacy Plan with a Personal Family Lawyer® attorney would have meant for Tony Hsieh's family.

• 𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐞. No public inventory, no public creditor claims, no record of who received what is available to anyone who searches the court docket.

• 𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐞𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞. A comprehensive plan says exactly who gets what, under what conditions, and when, not state law.

• 𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐭 𝐢𝐧. A successor trustee, already named, could have stepped in if Tony became incapacitated before he died. No court required.

• 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞. A properly managed plan doesn't go through probate. The successor trustee steps in, follows the instructions, and the estate settles privately.

Getting a plan in place didn't have to take a lot of time or disrupt his life and business. It required one good attorney and one real conversation.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: A Life & Legacy Plan doesn't eliminate grief. But it eliminates the legal chaos, the public exposure, and the contested transfers that turned Tony's estate into a years-long crisis.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐑𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞

A Life & Legacy Plan would have protected Tony's estate. But it wouldn't have written itself, funded itself, or kept itself current as his life changed.

That is where a Personal Family Lawyer firm leader makes the difference. Not just as someone who drafts the documents, but as someone who builds an ongoing relationship with you and your family and shows up for your family when you can’t.

In a situation like Tony's, a Personal Family Lawyer attorney would have started upstream, not at the moment of crisis but years earlier, in a real planning conversation. 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭. It would have asked: Who are the people in your life you want to provide for? Which of those relationships could be contentious? Are the people you trust to carry out your wishes actually named and ready? And most importantly: is your plan actually funded, meaning are your assets titled in a way that flows into the plan?

The difference between a trust that exists and a trust that works is whether someone stayed in the relationship long enough to make sure the assets were inside it. But without a Personal Family Lawyer attorney maintaining that relationship over time, the plan often gets started, but doesn’t get finished.

And if it had? When Tony died, his family would not have been starting from zero. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧, 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭.

𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐁𝐫𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐏𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐃𝐨 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬

Tony Hsieh was not uninformed. He was surrounded by advisors, attorneys, and people who understood business structure and risk. He lived in a world where estate planning was entirely accessible to him.

He just never did it. And this is far more common than most people realize. 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲.

You have to think about dying. You have to make decisions about who you trust, what you want to leave behind, and what happens when you're not there. For high-achieving people who are focused on building things, this kind of planning can feel like a detour, or like something you'll get to eventually.

"𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲" 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠.

Tony was 46. He had every reason to believe he had time. The house fire that took his life on Thanksgiving weekend was not something anyone would have predicted. You don't plan because you expect something to happen. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐲.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: Estate planning gets delayed not because people don't know it matters, but because it requires sitting down and making it real. Tony Hsieh knew more about systems and risk than most of us. But no one sat across from him and helped him do it.

𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

Having a plan and having a plan that actually works are two different things. There was no completed, funded plan in place when he died. The intention was there. The plan was not.

Creating a real plan means:

• Titling your assets correctly so they actually flow into your plan
• Reviewing beneficiary designations on every retirement account and insurance policy
• Naming people who know what you'd want them to do and can actually find everything
• Review the plan as your life changes, because a plan created in a different chapter of your life may not reflect who you are now

That's what eyes-wide-open planning looks like: knowing exactly who has authority, where everything is, and what happens next, so your family never has to find out the hard way.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: Having the right documents is the starting point. Having a plan that's current, funded, and backed by someone your family can call is what actually protects them.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐂𝐚𝐧 𝐃𝐨 𝐑𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐍𝐨𝐰

The story of Tony Hsieh isn't really about wealth. It's about what happens when someone who cared about the people in his life never got around to making sure they'd be taken care of. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐝 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞.

As a Personal Family Lawyer firm, we help you create a Life & Legacy Plan that keeps your estate private, your wishes enforceable, and your family protected from the kind of legal chaos Tony's family faced. We don't create one-size-fits-all documents. We take the time to understand your specific situation and design a plan that actually works when your loved ones need it to.

Schedule a complimentary 15-minute discovery call and let's find out where you stand.

Warmly,

Matt Wasinger, Attorney and Counselor at Law

This article is a service of Matt Wasinger, Personal Family Lawyer®. We don’t just draft documents; we ensure you make informed and empowered decisions about life and death, for yourself and the people you love. That's why we offer a Family Wealth Planning Session, ™ during which you will get more financially organized than you’ve ever been before, and make all the best choices for the people you love. You can begin by calling our office today to schedule a Family Wealth Planning Session and mention this article to find out how to get this $750 session at no charge.

05/18/2026

Tony Hsieh was 46 when he died in a house fire on Thanksgiving weekend in 2020. He had sold Zappos to Amazon for $1.2 billion. He had written a bestselling book called Delivering Happiness. He was surrounded by advisors, attorneys, and people who understood business structure and risk.

Yet, he had no will, no trust, and no instructions for the people he loved.

What followed was a years-long public legal proceeding. Contested gifts. Disputed promises tied to handwritten notes. An estate worth hundreds of millions of dollars was sorted out in court, in public, slowly and painfully.

None of it had to happen. Not a single day of it.

05/15/2026

Something I hear from blended families more than almost anything else after a loss:

"We thought we'd work it out together."

The hard truth? In a blended family, "together" has legal limits. Step-children don't automatically inherit. An ex may still have a claim. And grief has a way of making everyone's version of fair feel like the only one that matters.

A plan doesn't distrust your family. It removes the ambiguity before grief gets to answer that question.

05/14/2026

𝐇𝐞𝐫 𝐇𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐃𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈𝐂𝐄 𝐂𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐨𝐨𝐫.

You fall in love later in life. You marry. You start over.

Then your spouse dies suddenly.

Before you have time to grieve, the family starts fighting, the locks get changed, the mail stops arriving, and the basic stability of your life begins to slip away. Without the right legal planning, that kind of loss can trigger a chain reaction that is brutally hard to stop.

That is one of the clearest estate planning lessons in the reported story of Marie-Thérèse Ross-Mahé, an 86-year-old French widow who moved to Alabama to marry her first love. After her husband died without a will, she became trapped in a dispute over his estate and, days later, according to public reporting, was arrested by ICE and detained for 16 days.

No estate plan could have prevented every part of what happened to her. But a strong plan could have reduced confusion and created more protection for the surviving spouse.

And if she and her husband had an ongoing relationship with a Personal Family Lawyer®, she likely would not have been left to face those first days alone.

This is why estate planning matters. It is about protecting the people you love when they cannot protect themselves.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐋𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐁𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭

Ross-Mahé and her husband first fell in love decades ago, found each other again after both had been widowed, and in 2025, she moved to the United States, married him, and applied for a green card.

Then he died in January 2026 without a will.

When someone dies without a will, they have died intestate. That means state law decides who inherits, who has authority, and how the estate gets handled. In a later-in-life marriage involving adult children, real estate, separate assets, and cross-border issues, that can become a perfect storm.

What many families call an inheritance fight is often a planning failure that was waiting to happen.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: If you are in a second marriage, a later-in-life marriage, or a blended family, you need a plan that is clear, current, and legally enforceable. Love does not eliminate confusion. Grief does not prevent conflict.

𝐑𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐏𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐫 𝐃𝐨 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐃𝐨𝐨𝐫

Ross-Mahé may have had legal rights as a surviving spouse under Alabama law. But legal rights on paper are not the same as real-world protection.

According to her family and court proceedings, after her husband died, there were allegations of intimidation, redirected mail, and attempts to take control of the home and estate assets. Whether every allegation is ultimately proven is up to the legal process. The larger estate planning lesson is clear: when authority is vague, someone often tries to seize control.

A strong estate plan is designed to reduce that risk.

For many families, that means having:

• A valid will
• A revocable living trust, when appropriate
• Clear instructions about who has the authority to act
• Updated beneficiary designations
• Powers of attorney for financial and health care decisions
• Written guidance for what should happen right after a death

Without those pieces, survivors are often left trying to prove relationships, track assets, access accounts, and defend themselves while still in shock.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: Estate planning is about control, timing, access, and protection in the first days and weeks after a death. One missing document can create a crisis.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐈𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐦 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐅𝐚𝐜𝐞

One of the most dangerous assumptions in estate planning is this: my family will work it out.

Blended families carry an extra emotional charge. Adult children may feel protective. A surviving spouse may feel isolated. Old resentments can surface.

If that family is also dealing with a house, personal property, bank accounts, retirement funds, and unclear authority, conflict can escalate fast.

That is why later-in-life couples need to make deliberate choices while both people are alive and well. Who stays in the home? What can the surviving spouse use? What goes to children? Who manages the estate? None of it should be left to guesswork.

This kind of planning is especially important when one spouse has moved countries, depends on the other for housing or paperwork, or has fewer local support systems.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: If your plan depends on everyone being reasonable later, you do not have a plan.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐚𝐢𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐂𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐤

Ross-Mahé told the court her mail had been redirected, which allegedly caused her to miss an immigration appointment. That highlights a truth most families do not see until it is too late: after a death, the practical systems of life keep moving.

Bills still come. Deadlines still run. Government notices still arrive.

If the surviving spouse does not have immediate access to information, money, housing, and authority, the damage can multiply quickly.

Think about how fast this can unfold:

• A missed notice can trigger an immigration problem
• A frozen account can leave someone without cash for basic expenses
• A fight over the house can create immediate housing instability
• Unclear authority can delay probate and drain the estate through legal fees

This matters to ordinary families, too. If there is a home, a bank account, a retirement account, or a business, there is something at risk.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: The real emergency after a death is often administrative before it is financial. Your plan needs to work on day one, not six months later.

𝐈𝐟 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐅𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐲, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐃𝐨𝐮𝐛𝐥𝐞

Ross-Mahé was not only a surviving spouse. She was also living in a new country, navigating immigration status, and relying on a system of notices, appointments, and records that became harder to manage after her husband died.

If your spouse was born in another country, owns property abroad, has dual citizenship, is seeking permanent residency, or relies on immigration filings connected to the marriage, your estate plan cannot stop with a will. It needs to account for the real-life systems your family depends on.

That can include:

• Keeping immigration records organized and accessible
• Making sure trusted people know where key documents are
• Coordinating with both estate planning and immigration counsel
• Clarifying who can receive mail, notices, and legal information
• Planning for what happens if a spouse dies before an application is approved
• Making sure the surviving spouse has immediate access to money, housing, and support

If your family lives across borders, that risk increases.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞: If your family life touches more than one country, your planning needs to reflect that reality. A basic domestic will may not be enough.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐁𝐞 𝐃𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐑𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐍𝐨𝐰

If this family were mine, I would not be waiting for the legal system to sort itself out.

The first thing I would do is sit with her, in person or by phone, and walk through her legal rights as a surviving spouse. Those rights exist even without a will. The problem is that rights on paper do not protect you at the front door. Someone still has to know how to exercise them, and that is not a conversation to have alone while you are still in shock.

I would make sure she had immediate access to whatever funds were available to cover housing, food, and daily expenses while the estate was sorted. I would work to document her right to remain in the marital home. I would coordinate with her immigration attorney, or help her find one, to make sure no deadline was slipping by while her attention was consumed by grief and conflict.

I would locate every key document: the deed to the house, the bank accounts, the immigration file, and any life insurance policies. I would make sure trusted people knew exactly where those documents were and who had authority to act on them.

And I would be the one answering the phone when things got confusing.

Because what a surviving spouse often needs most in those first days is not just legal advice. 𝐈𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲, 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥.

That is what I mean when I say we build a relationship, not just a plan.

𝐖𝐡𝐲 𝐆𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐩 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬

If your family includes a second marriage, adult children from prior relationships, real estate, or cross-border issues, this is not a do-it-yourself project. The right plan has to work in real life, under stress, with actual human beings involved.

A good estate planning process helps you see the risks your family may not spot on its own, then build a plan that protects the people you love from confusion, conflict, and unnecessary harm. With a Personal Family Lawyer, the value is also having a trusted advisor who can be there for your family when you cannot.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐂𝐚𝐧 𝐃𝐨 𝐑𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐍𝐨𝐰

If the people you love would be vulnerable after your death or incapacity, do not leave them with uncertainty. As a Personal Family Lawyer® Firm, we help you create a Life & Legacy Plan® that is designed to work when your family actually needs it, not just look complete on paper. We do not just draft documents. We build a relationship with you and your family so there is someone your loved ones can turn to when something happens and you cannot be there. Schedule a complimentary 15-minute discovery call and let us help you understand what would happen to your family if something happened to you.

Warmly,

Matt Wasinger, Attorney and Counselor at Law

This article is a service of Matt Wasinger, Personal Family Lawyer®. We don’t just draft documents; we ensure you make informed and empowered decisions about life and death, for yourself and the people you love. That's why we offer a Family Wealth Planning Session, ™ during which you will get more financially organized than you’ve ever been before, and make all the best choices for the people you love. You can begin by calling our office today to schedule a Family Wealth Planning Session and mention this article to find out how to get this $750 session at no charge.

Wasinger Law Office, PLLC

05/29/2026

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