Uche O. Nwakudu & Associates Ltd

09/06/2021

US Immigration Puzzle

If you are married to two wives in your country where polygamy is permitted and you come to the US and want to marry an American to get your papers, how many divorce papers do you have to provide?

A guy from somewhere in Africa who was married to two wives went to a US Immigration interview. He was asked why he presented only one divorce paper because they had evidence of his former polygamous status through his social media postings. Smart guy, he said one of his former wives was a spare wife. He got his green card.

What is the moral of this man's story?

a) Be smart always
b) Don't post everything on social media
c) Avoid polygamy
d) Get two divorces if you were married to two wives

CORRECT ANSWER GETS $50 bucks on us

01/01/2021

07/22/2020

MARRIAGE & DIVORCE TIPS

1. Don't get married until you've learned about divorce. It's better to know how it might end before it begins.
2. Divorce is the reason you should not have married in the first place.
3. Divorce is proof that marriage vows don't mean jack. So, why make them?
4. The first victim of a marriage headed for divorce is s*x.
5. If cheating starts, it never ends. It's like he**in; once you try it, you'll like it.
6. Your divorce lawyer will listen to and act on your crazy stories as long as you have the money to pay.
7. One of you is the Devil and it's neither you nor your spouse. Guess who?
8. If it's costing you a load of money for your lawyer to fight for you, what exactly is he fighting for?
9. A lawyer advising you to fix what is wrong with your marriage is like a mechanic giving you tips about how to change your oil. Never happens.
10. Don't bring into the marriage what you don't want to lose in divorce.

AT OUR LAW FIRM, we don't focus much on who did what or who didn't do what. We focus precisely on what's at stake; Is there marital property (personal, real, or financial)? Are there any minor children? Are there any inequities that warrant spousal support? That's it.

Even though there's an emotional aspect to divorce, it's mainly your personal business. We may offer you an ear for you to vent your anger and frustration or a shoulder to cry on, but we always keep our focus on what you are entitled to.

Because we know that marriage may be bliss but divorce is a leave-nothing-on-the-table business.

08/20/2019

IT'S ONLY FAIR

When you're tying the marital knot, you invite friends and family to cheer you on; when you're breaking the marital knot, you should at least invite friends and family to boo.

A divorce client vowed to do just that in her own way: She's going to send postcards to all the people who came to her wedding six years ago to apologize for dragging them out to celebrate a marriage that she now says was doomed to fail from the get-go.

If you were a guest at the wedding, do you deserve an apology?

At Uche O. Nwakudu & Associates, we don't do apologies for making your divorce as painless as possible, but we agree with you 100% about whatever it is you want to do afterwards.

08/20/2019

IT'S ONLY FAIR

When you're tying the marital knot, you invite friends and family to cheer you on; when you're breaking the marital knot, you should at least invite friends and family to boo.

A divorce client vowed to do just that in her own way: She's going to send postcards to all the people who came to her wedding six years ago to apologize for dragging them out to celebrate a marriage that she now says was doomed to fail from the get-go.

If you were a guest at the wedding, do you deserve an apology?

At Uche O. Nwakudu & Associates, we don't do apologies for making your divorce as painless as possible, but we agree with you 100% about whatever it is you want to do afterwards.

06/07/2019

THERE'S ACTUALLY A DEPORTATION FORCE ON THE LOOSE IN THE US.

Was at the immigration court in Chicago recently and the place was packed full of immigrants from around the world in deportation proceedings. Yes, Trump promised and appeared to backpedal on creating a deportation force during the 2016 campaign. Today, while everyone is looking somewhere else, Trump's deportation force is in full swing, quietly snagging anyone from Visa overstays to immigrants actually deserving of deportation.

According to Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents I had conversations with recently, Nigerians account for the largest number of visa overstays from Africa. And of the 300 or so arrests in the Chicago area in May alone, 40% were Nigerians.

Which begs the question, why would anyone consciously stay beyond their permitted stay and not consciously be doing something to regularize their stay? Deportation or Removal proceedings can be very expensive and remedies are next to nonexistent. However immigration attorneys are having a field day at the courts reaping thousands of dollars from hapless immigrants and promising them improbable remedies.

Our law office has advised dozens of immigrants and would-be migrants who are in deportation, have been arrested by ICE, or are planning to come to the US to stay. We are candid in our assessments and we do our best to ensure that immigrants and would-be immigrants get the best advice and/or representation. Here are a few:

If you're coming to the US on a visitor Visa or B1-B2 and plan to leave after your visit:

1. Don't spend a day beyond 2 weeks if you told them at the embassy or at the airport that you're only going to stay 2 weeks.

2. If you told them at the embassy that you are going to New York, don't buy a ticket to Chicago.

3. If your passport is stamped NoAOS/NoEOS at the airport upon arrival; forget about any plans to stay.

If you're planning to stay:
1. Make sure you understand your options and start doing some things before you come because your allowed duration of stay may not be sufficient to get things done.

2. Think ahead because if you told them you're visiting for a few weeks and end up staying, you would have committed a fraud to evade immigration laws and that can be held against you.

3. Also, the arrangee, arms-length marriage thing does not work very much anymore. They'll sniff you out. Probability of success is down from 35% to 5%. Slim chance.

OUR HOTLINE: (630) 341-1376 is always open to answer your questions but we will prefer to answer them here.

01/29/2019

DON'T EVER WALK AWAY FROM THAT FENDER-BENDER WITHOUT GETTING PAID

It's just a nick; so what?
It's just a small bump, who cares?
They're the ones who should be careful about their driving; you already are.
Small bump, big bump; small scratch, big scratch; small dent, big dent; it doesn't matter.
We'll get you some money all the same.
Just don't let someone else get away with their bad driving, that's all.

01/03/2019

Wisdom is a virtue; foolishness is a vice:

Before you tell me to pay you money to teach me how to make money, you must have all the money you need. So, why do you need my money?

12/29/2018

Ready for 2019... Are you?

12/29/2018

HE WANTED S*X; SHE WANTED MARRIAGE

She told him point blank that she would not have s*x with him until after their marriage. Never mind that she was 39, had been married before, and had three children.

He persisted; she demurred. It almost seemed like all he wanted from her was s*x even though they had agreed to get married to enable her get her papers.

So, one hot summer day, they went to the courthouse and got married. Then they went to her place and had s*x. She doesn't recollect if it was two times or one long time that felt like two times, but it happened.

Then he put on his clothes and told her he was going down the street to get a pack of ci******es. And...

That was the last time she saw him. He disappeared along with her $2,000 part payment, changed his phone number, and possibly changed town.

SHE GOT HER MARRIAGE; HE GOT HIS S*X

What do you think?