10/23/2025
Sometimes the beauty isn't in the building—it's in the breaking. And true strength can only come through the remaking.
For 18 months, I've had a profound realization: I didn't need another award. I needed healing, peace, and space.
My identity had been shifting for a long time, but it took a series of intense breaking points to crack the foundation. I was living an identity fueled by striving, feeling unworthy, and a "success" powered by fear. Unlearning that mindset has been a decade-long undertaking that started with my son's birth.
Last year, the world unraveled. My mom was recovering from breast cancer, my dad had a stroke, and my sister was diagnosed with kidney failure. Simultaneously, I was in a severe car accident that caused a dozen injuries. It was another sign forcing me to confront what truly matters.
I used to excuse my striving as doing "something great" for the beautiful humans in my life, but I didn't truly nurture those relationships daily. The truth is: the humans God puts in your life are more important than any accomplishment.
As driven people, how do we find the balance? How do we heal, find peace, and pursue success while honoring the relationships God has given us?
I still don't have the perfect balance, but I've learned that life works in seasons. I didn't need a season of winning awards; I needed a season of space and peace. For someone used to striving, this is the hardest path of all. All the voices told me to run and strive, but I need to let go and let God BRING peace.
This journey requires absolutely destroying your ego and laying down the old identity society praises. It means picking up a new one that requires a different kind of self-sacrifice:
Visiting your grandmother every Sunday is just as meaningful as walking the next stage.
A conversation with your son about the next Harry Potter book is more important than another hour of cold-calling.
Listening to the birds with a cup of coffee and a Bible actually makes you more successful in the long run.
The car accident has limited my abilities severely. Watching a part of me die—the 'old me'—has been nothing short of extreme grief and loss. But I am determined to heal one grueling day at a time as I pursue God and peace.
How do you redefine success when you step away from the relentless pursuit of more for more's sake? Talk to me.
