05/03/2026
How the Government Ruined Marriage and the Family
Marriage used to mean something different in this country. It was about sticking things out, building something over time, and raising a family with some level of stability. It wasn’t perfect, but it worked for a lot of people. Over the years, that foundation has been chipped away, and a big part of that comes from how the system is set up today.
Start with money, because that’s what drives behavior whether people admit it or not. The tax system doesn’t always reward marriage. In some cases, two people can actually be better off financially staying single than getting married. That doesn’t make sense if you’re trying to promote stable households. When people see that combining incomes costs them more, it changes how they think about commitment.
Then there are government assistance programs. A lot of them are structured so that once a household earns above a certain amount, benefits get reduced or disappear. That creates a situation where a single parent can receive more support than a married couple making the same money. Nobody says it out loud, but the system sends a clear signal. Stay separate and you might come out ahead.
Divorce laws also changed the landscape. When no fault divorce became common, it made it easier to walk away. There were good reasons behind that change, especially in situations where people were in bad or unsafe relationships. But it also lowered the bar for ending a marriage. What used to be a serious, last resort decision became more routine. Over time, that shifts how people view marriage going in.
Family court doesn’t help much either. It often turns personal issues into drawn out legal battles where money and positioning take center stage. Instead of helping families find solutions, the process can make things worse, especially when kids are involved.
None of this happened because someone sat down and said let’s destroy families. A lot of these policies were created to fix real problems. The issue is that they didn’t fully think through how people would respond. When you build a system that rewards independence over cooperation, people adjust to it.
The end result is a country where marriage isn’t supported the way it used to be. In some cases, it feels like it’s working against you. That’s not just a personal issue, it affects communities and the next generation.
If anything is going to change, the incentives have to change. People follow what benefits them. Right now, the structure doesn’t always favor staying together, and until that gets addressed, the trend isn’t likely to reverse.
Written by: Gary Ewing
