03/09/2026
My child is 12… can they choose which parent they live with?”
This is one of the most common questions parents ask after separation.
The short answer? No. Children do not get to make the final decision about where they live.
However, that does not mean their views are ignored.
When making parenting decisions, the Court will consider many factors, including:
A child’s age and maturity
Their views and experiences
Their relationship with each parent
Any safety concerns
What arrangements are in their best interests
Older children may have their views given more weight, but there is no automatic age where a child gets to “choose”.
The focus is always on creating arrangements that support the child’s wellbeing and best interests.
We explain what parents need to know about children’s wishes after separation in our blog here: https://umbrellafamilylaw.com.au/can-my-child-choose-which-parent-to-live-with-after-separation/