Best Conflict Solutions, LLC

25/09/2026

Huge congratulations to Melinda Feldman, Anthony S. Khoury, Esq., LL.M., and Kelly Myers, CDC®, on receiving the 2026 President's Award from the Statewide California Mediation Association.

This award goes to members who go above and beyond, not just showing up for the organization but strengthening it, and who gave real support to SCMA's president throughout the year. As a fellow member of a volunteer led field, I know how much unseen work sits behind an honor like this.

A special congratulations to my friend Melinda Feldman. Watching your commitment to this community over the years, this recognition is so well deserved.

Congratulations to all three of you. SCMA is stronger because of the work you do.

24/09/2026

Each week I write "We Need to Talk" for The Kewanee Voice (kewaneevoice.com), a nonprofit local paper in Illinois, answering readers' letters about the conversations they've been avoiding. Some of you asked me to share, so here's the first:

We Need to Talk
with Kimberly Best

Dear Kim,

My sister and I have been close our whole lives, but lately every conversation turns into an argument. Politics, how to handle Mom's living situation, even how I make my BBQ. If I say what I really think, she acts like I've betrayed her. So now I just agree with everything or keep my mouth shut, and honestly, both feel terrible. I miss my sister. How do I talk to her without it turning into a fight?

Biting M. Tongue

Dear Biting

First, I want you to notice something in your own letter. You said you miss your sister, and she's right there. That tells me the argument isn't really about BBQ. You've both started treating disagreement as evidence that the other one has switched sides.

Here's an idea worth writing on the refrigerator: "Just because I don't agree with you doesn't mean I'm against you. It means I'm different from you." That's all it means. You and your sister grew up in the same house, but you've lived two different lives since, collected different experiences, and come to different conclusions. That's not betrayal. That's two people.

In my mediation work, I've learned there's almost never one right answer in a disagreement. There are two truths, at least. Your sister's truth about Mom's living situation came from somewhere real, and so did yours. When we stop trying to figure out who's wrong, we free up all that energy for something more useful: figuring out what each of us actually needs. And enjoying different versions of BBQ.

So here's what I'd try. The next time she says something you disagree with, don't argue and don't fold. Say four words instead: "Tell me more about that." Then actually listen, not the kind of listening where you're loading your comeback, but the kind where you're trying to understand how a person you love arrived somewhere different than you did. You'll be amazed what those four words do. They tell her she doesn't have to defend herself, and a person who doesn't have to defend herself can finally hear you too.

And when it's your turn, try starting with "Here's how I see it" instead of "Here's how it is." One invites a conversation. The other invites a rebuttal.

Will this fix everything by Sunday dinner? Probably not. But you don't need to fix everything. You need to make it safe for two sisters to be different in the same room. Silent agreement isn't peace, it's just quieter conflict, and it costs you the very closeness you're trying to protect.

Make your BBQ your way. Love her anyway. Those two things were never in conflict to begin with.

Kim

Have a conversation you've been avoiding? Write to Kim at [email protected]. Letters may be edited for length and privacy.

Kimberly Best, RN, MA, is a court-listed mediator in Missouri and Tennessee, a FINRA arbitrator, and founder of Best Conflict Solutions, LLC in St. Louis. She is the creator of the Best Conflict Conversation Cards. Learn more at bestconflictsolutions.com.

23/09/2026

Episode 212 of the Healthcare Leadership Excellence podcast is live, and I had such a good conversation with host Karl Pister for this one.

If you don't know Karl's show, it's worth the subscribe. He digs into real leadership challenges through the lens of outstanding healthcare professionals, and he brings a level of curiosity and care to these conversations that makes guests actually open up.

We talked about my path from critical care and ER nursing into mediation, why conflict feels so threatening to so many of us, and how the ladder of inference has us reaching conclusions before we even understand what is happening. We also got into broken trust, difficult workplace relationships, and why HR should not be expected to solve every disagreement alone.

The short version: conflict is normal. The goal was never to eliminate it. The goal is building the skill to handle it well.

Full episode link in bio/comments. If this conversation resonates and you want practical tools for your own team, the Best Conflict Conversation Cards: Workplace Edition give people the evidence-based skills we talked about, in a format your team will actually use.

Podcast listeners get 10% off with code PODCAST10 at bestconflictsolutions.com

Pister Leadership Excellence

22/09/2026

Children fall out and are back together by morning—what if adults relearned that practice? In “What the Playground Knows That We Forgot,” Kimberly Best explores how small acts of repair rebuild trust, respect, and conflict skills we desperately need at home, work, and society. Read the full essay and start practicing repair today: https://wix.to/Pip3T4V

Children fall out with each other constantly, and the next morning they are back on the same blacktop. Somewhere between second grade and adulthood, we started treating a broken conversation as permanent. Our family conflicts and our geopolitical conflicts are the same conflicts scaled up. Only the....

21/09/2026

We practice knot tying. We practice codes. We practice deliveries. We never practice the hard conversation.

Dr. Lee Sharma opened Ep69 of Scalpel and Sword with that, and it is the whole reason the Best Conflict Conversation Cards exist.

Fifty cards. One skill at a time. Practice it alone and nobody has to know, or work one card a week with your team.

Card number one: just because I don't agree with you doesn't mean I'm against you. It means I'm different from you.

Full episode wherever you listen. Cards at bestconflictsolutions.com, code PODCAST10 for 10% off, free shipping as always.

18/09/2026

Why should healthcare teams rehearse difficult conversations the same way they rehearse procedures? New on the blog: Mediator Kimberly Best, RN, MA joins Dr. Lee Sharma on the Scalpel and Sword podcast to explore practicing conflict skills, the Best Conflict Conversation Cards, and how rehearsal improves patient care and team safety. Read more: https://wix.to/C6KiKXW

Mediator Kimberly Best, RN, MA returns to Dr. Lee Sharma's Scalpel and Sword podcast for Ep69 to talk about practicing conflict skills in healthcare, the Best Conflict Conversation Cards, and why a hard conversation deserves the same rehearsal as any procedure.

18/09/2026

I am excited for the Association of Missouri Mediators 2026 Annual Conference, The Art of Resolution, happening October 2nd on Zoom, with small group viewing sites in Liberty (Kansas City) and St. Louis.

I will be presenting on Mediating Healthcare and End of Life Decisions, digging into the ethical, legal, and moral layers of these conversations and how we help families hold the balance between preserving life and honoring someone's autonomy. Here is a short preview if you want a feel for the session: https://youtu.be/Mj2zdnNKyAE

The full lineup is excellent. Professor Stevenson Carlebach on The Influence Equation, Kim L. Kirn and Michael Giegerman on ABA Formal Opinion 518, Val U Baul French on Mediating the Political Divide, and Zena Zumeta and Marya Kolman leading a Mediation Ethics Game workshop. Six hours of continuing education are approved, including 2.5 ethics hours.

Early bird registration ends today, so if you have been on the fence, now is the time. You can register at www.momediators.org/2026-conference.html

Association of Missouri Mediators, Inc. Carlebach Kirn Giegerman French Zumeta Kolman

Register now for AMM's 2026 annual conference -

16/09/2026

Our LinkedIn newsletter just surpassed 1,700 subscribers.



What an honor, and a responsibility.



Every one of you showed up because conflict, in some form, touches your work or your life. Maybe it is a team that cannot seem to get on the same page. Maybe it is a family navigating a hard season together. Maybe it is the quiet burnout that comes from carrying tension no one names out loud.



I do not take that trust lightly. My goal with every issue is to give you something you can actually use, not just something to read.



So I would love to hear from you. What topics do you want more of? Workplace conflict? Healthcare and burnout? Family and caregiving dynamics? Something else entirely?



Let me know in the comments. This newsletter is for you, and I want to keep shaping it around what is actually useful.

Association of Missouri Mediators, Inc.

14/09/2026

I am delighted to be co-facilitating a cohort of the ABA DR Practice Incubator alongside Molly Thomas.

One detail I love: the first meeting has no slides. It is about people. The group gets to know each other, writes its own charter, names itself, and sets the vision the whole year hangs on. That hour is why the group still functions in month seven, and why members tend to stay in touch long after June.

Nine months, October through June, with the two of us there the whole way. The application window closes September 14, and that is a firm date. Nine months is a real commitment, but I keep saying yes because I learn as much from the cohort as they do from us. If it has been on your list, this is the week. practiceincubator.com

12/09/2026

https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:ugcPost:7503036612855906304/

Be part of the improvement that the healthcare system needs - whether as a consumer or a practitioner. Thank you Dr. Lee Sharma for your commitment to better healthcare culture, and for including me in the conversation.

“We’ve normalized a system that’s not our best.” 🔥 THIS. One of my favorite parts of this conversation with the absolutely awesome Kimberly Best, RN, MA is her recognition that healthcare doesn’t have to accept dysfunctional conflict as simply “the way it is.” A healthy system chang...